Saturday, July 31, 2010

Are my Eyes playing tricks on me????



Woke up this morning... knowing it was our testing day... I didn't really wait, but the other tests I took were all negative. So I hopped out of bed, and grabbed a test... off to the bathroom... and then wait... tick tock tick tock... 5 minutes later.... I can't tell, am I seeing something??? So I grab another test and dip again.... this is what I saw.... I asked Timmy... and he thinks he sees it too... but we are not sure....
If you look really closely, you can see a faint faint line to the left of the dark line... but to make sure, we had to get a better test....

So I tell Timmy... run to CVS get a better test... seeing that I was using cheap internet tests that I ordered before I got pregnant with Timothy Joseph... so off he went... I was pacing....

His car pulled up, and in he came.... time to try testing again...

This time the wait was only 3 minutes long.... we sat in the bedroom, while the test was in the bathroom. I promised Timmy he could be the first to look... watching the clock on my phone... tick tock tick tock... We are both VERY impatient... so finally, the time said 10:13am... and off Timmy went to the bathroom, me following close behind... he goes in, and I just watch his expression, (hoping that he wouldn't be playing with me).... and this is what he saw...
So many emotions ran through our minds... Happy, sad, excited, scared, joyous, nervous... all that are to be expected after last time...

Now to just wait out the weekend, so I can call the doctor's office bright and early Monday morning to set our 1st Appointment....

Monday, July 26, 2010

Waiting.....

I never knew how impatient I was.... tapping my fingers... pacing... just waiting. I try to do things to pass the time, but my mind just circles.... will this be the month??? I'm still excited but nervous!

And we just passed 9 months... 9 MONTHS!!! I can't believe it's been that long... feels like just yesterday I held Timothy Joseph in my arms.... I know he's watching over us. Boy I miss him!

Monday, July 12, 2010

Hopeful.......

Our Second Chance to try again starts next week.... my emotions are high, and low.... I don't know what to feel, what to think...

Will I be okay?
Will I be neurotic?
Can I stay calm?
Will I be able to handle the daily meds?
Will it happen our first try?
Will it take a few months?
How much will I spend in tests? (LOL)

I know we have our Angel Timothy Joseph watching over us, and making sure we are safe... as well as many other Angels!

Wish us Luck!


Saturday, July 10, 2010

Starting Over....

We had our appointment with our High Risk doctor on June 29th... he gave us the "go ahead" to start trying again... We're just going to have to take things day by day... and I will have to overcome one of my phobias! But I guess after everything I went through last time, I should be able to do anything and everything this time. I love that my husband tells me that I'm strong and can do it... I will just have to remember:

"Promise me you'll always remember...
You're BRAVER than you believe,
and STRONGER than you seem,
and SMARTER than you think."
- Christopher Robin to Pooh



Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers